Cedar Planked Salmon

After having multiple Red Bull’s throughout the day all it took was cooking dinner to really get my heart pumping; or more specifically a small fire to get my heart pumping. Grilled salmon on a cedar plank is really quite tasty.  But I was also trying to feed Lavender & make a homemade pasta salad out of whatever I could find in the kitchen.  I saw the grill smoking, I checked on it a few times but then when I could see flames coming out of the grill I figured now may be a good time to take the salmon off the grill.  Except the entire plank was engulfed in flames, smoke was pouring out of the grill, I turned the grill off and closed it thinking it would just put itself out.  Here’s the thing though, I have a large piece of wood with a somewhat oily fish on it fully on fire in my grill on the deck of my house.  It’s not going to go out…at least not before someone calls the fire department due to the thick, gray smoke billowing from my deck.  The entire roof of the porch is filled with smoke and I’m getting worried that maybe I’m gonna catch the railing on fire.  Should I go get the fire extinguisher?  Pour water on the grill?  And is that okay with a gas grill?  Meanwhile, Lavender is slurping down the food that I’ve let October feed her; Scarlett is trying to run into the kitchen to get more food for Lavender and I’m yelling at her to GET OUT OF THE KITCHEN!!  I get the oven mitts on, turn the kitchen faucet on, my plan is to take the flaming plank and rest it on a cookie sheet and dump it into the sink.  But what if I drop the flames on the floor?  Well…I gotta do something.  I’ve already tried calling Jeff to get his advice. No answer.  I scream at the kids one more time to GET OUT OF THE KITCHEN.  Scarlett starts crying.  I grab the flaming plank, slide it onto a cookie sheet and hurry into the kitchen sink.  But wait…if I dump it in water then I’ll also ruin the fish.  Seriously, at this point this should not have been my concern.  But I somehow manage to get the plank to smoldering without drenching the salmon in water.  Not that dinner is exactly saved; I now have Cajun salmon and there is no way the kids are eating it; I’m pretty sure Jeff will be ordering pizza as soon as I leave for work.  I dumped the charred remains into the sink and let the water run.  I’ve opened the doors and windows of the house; turned on the bathroom fans and stove fan – October is commenting on how smoky it is and Scarlett is yelling that the pasta salad I made (while the salmon was on fire) is DISGUISTING!  Three minutes later, Jeff walked through the front door and immediately asked if he could close the door wall…as it was a little chilly.  Yeah, yeah….that was most pressing of my problems!  Maybe I WILL order pizza tomorrow night.